What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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