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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?
Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?
"Would you like fries with that?"
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?
Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??
None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?
Night manager at McDonalds
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.
It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?
Glass flippers.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?
I wuv you watts and watts.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?
A tyrannosauraus wreck
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