What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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