What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.

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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop

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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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