What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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