What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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