What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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