What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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