What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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