What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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