What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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