What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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