What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.

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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.

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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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