What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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