What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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