What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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