What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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