What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!

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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.

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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess

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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.

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