What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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