What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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