What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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