What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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