What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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