What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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