What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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