What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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