What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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