What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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