What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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