What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What is a boxer's favorite drink?

Punch.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.

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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!

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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle

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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.

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