What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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