What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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