What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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