What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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