What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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