What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.

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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?

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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.

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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.

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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop

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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."

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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!

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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."

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