What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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