What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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