What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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