What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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