What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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