What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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