What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.

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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.

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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.

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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.

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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.

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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?

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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".

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