What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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