What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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