What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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