What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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