What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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