What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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