What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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