What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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