What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.

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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.

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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.

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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.

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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck

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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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