What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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