What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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