What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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