What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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