What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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