What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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