What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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