What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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