What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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