What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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