What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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