What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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