What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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