What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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