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What is the most important rule in chemistry?
Never lick the spoon!
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What did one cow say to the other?
Mooooooove over
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?
Porkchop
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How does an attorney sleep?
First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.
Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??
None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?
Camembert.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?
Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?
"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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