What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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