What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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