What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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