What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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