What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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