What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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