What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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