What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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