What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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