What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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