What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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