What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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