What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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