What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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