What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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