What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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