What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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