What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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