What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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