What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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