What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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