What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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