What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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