What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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