What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
Canvas not available.

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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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