What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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