What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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