What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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