What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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