What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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