What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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