What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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