What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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