What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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