What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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