What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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