What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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