What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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