What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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