What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!

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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison

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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.

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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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