What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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