What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?

A river.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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