What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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