What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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