What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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