What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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