What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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