What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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