What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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