What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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