What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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