What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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