What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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