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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?
Flood lights!
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?
An udder failure.
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?
He was feeling a Lil Weezy
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C
and still be 0k?
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"
I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?
On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?
None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?
Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?
A fire cracker
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