What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.

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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.

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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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