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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?
Owlgebra
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?
The Trump Card
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.
Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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What do Santa's elves drive?
Minivans.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"
The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?
Polar Bond.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?
Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!
You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"
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