What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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