What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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