What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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