What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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