What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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