What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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