What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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