What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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