What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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