What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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