What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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