What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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