What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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