What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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What is a boxer's favorite drink?

Punch.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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