What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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