What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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