What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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