What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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