What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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