What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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