What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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