What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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