What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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