What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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