What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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