What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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