What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That isn't funny!
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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