What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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