What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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