What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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