What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What do you call the king of vegetables?

Elvis Parsley.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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