What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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