What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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