What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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