What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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