What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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