What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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They stopped a vulture from bringing his rotting carcasses on the plane

but he said "You said I could have two carry on items!"
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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