What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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