What letter can you drink?

T (tea)

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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow

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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.

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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.

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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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