What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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