What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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