What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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