What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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