What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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