What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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