What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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