What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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