What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.

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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.

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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.

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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.

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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.

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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.

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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards

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