What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.

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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy

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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.

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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.

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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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