What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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