What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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