What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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