What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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