What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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