What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.

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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.

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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday

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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.

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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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