What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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