What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.

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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.

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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!

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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.

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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood

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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.

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