What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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